Being cheated on can traumatize you for life and give you trust issues in every other relationship. Getting back to dating and meeting new people after being cheated on can be very difficult. How do you know you’re ready to date again without being paranoid about every little thing your partner does—that could trigger old feelings of suspicion and insecurity, like are they checking their phone often?
Here are some tips that can help you get over those feelings:
1. Working On Yourself Is Key
Let’s face the truth: The cheating probably scarred you, and you want that scar to heal before jumping into another relationship. That is why it is so important to be emotionally healthy and fully healed prior to entering a new relationship following one during which you were cheated on. Only when you are again happy with yourself you can go back to being happy as a couple.
2. Work On The Relationship
Only when the problems in a relationship have been identified, and only if both partners are willing to change what’s not working, the relationship can be improved. Doing things the same way you always have will give you the same results. You have to started taking action in bettering the relationship you have with your partner and consider going to therapy.
3. If You Don’t Feel Like You Are Ready, Take A Break From Dating
If you decide to end things with the person who cheated on you, definitely consider taking a break from dating all together. This goes along with the “work on yourself” idea and how it’s great to spend time alone . You can try new hobbies, as well as healthy current ones you have.
4. Look At Others Who Have Survived It And Moved On
I bet you can think of someone who was in a similar situation as you. How did they get past it? What tips and advice can they give you? Chances are they have moved on and are finally at peace. That can be you, too! You’ll feel whole again. Someday. But right now, keep doing the above.
You don’t want to hear this, but as long as you keep blaming each other and defending yourself, you won’t be able to move forward. Forgiving each other doesn’t mean denying what happened, or that it would be OK if it happened again. What it does mean, is that you’re willing to close that chapter and finally move on with your life.